- to do: lay gold statue of a person on the bottom of a community pool, just to see which kids have read cs lewis. #restimar #
- pioneering new handfuls diet: 1) stand at open fridge. 2) indiscriminately ingest handfuls of all you can reach 3) stop when you fall ill. #
- in completely unrelated news, we are now out of tortilla chips, princess vitamins, and paperclips. and maybe percocet. #handfulsdiet #
- posited: percocet tablets are the real princess vitamins on account of how they make one feel JUST LIKE A PRINCESS. #
- @taylor_audrey sorry to report, with argument shattering veracity, that these are gummy princess vitamins. in reply to taylor_audrey #
- Entertaining myself by singing "parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme" in gollum's voice. #
- Some days I'm just glad humans don't have anal glands. #
- 'Everything you do pleases me; even your name pleases me.' RT @MikeHawthorne: Fellini's letter to Moebius http://t.co/zXIsir0T #
- @mkazoo I try to start as many conversations as possible with HEY GURL HEY. It doesn't get me dates, but this works for me, yes. in reply to mkazoo #
- @mkazoo also am mostly imagining you swaggering and collar popping. ultimate hilarity. in reply to mkazoo #
- Get Carter of Mars #
- like Pocahontas that one time. RT @kellysue: Photo: No hit Spider-Man! Best kid ever, via @zdarsky. http://t.co/Vl1EchBL #
- Qui est le roi des mèmes sur Internet? #
- @GreatDismal i read all of edgar rice burroughs' work when i was fourteen in one binge via project gutenberg. #stygian in reply to GreatDismal #
- @mkazoo DEAL. in reply to mkazoo #
- @rstevens "he got poop in the newspaper." a high point in both your life, and the lives of many puppies. in reply to rstevens #
- if every time i wished i had written already, i wrote, i would right now have a lot of writing written. #
- your mom is such a refined lush, she tried to garnish ginseng supplements with a slice of cucumber. #
- "I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. /
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. /
I learn by going where I have to go." — roethke # - @damiengwalter write a scene that builds sympathy for someone you hate, from his pov. #writingexercise in reply to damiengwalter #
- @damiengwalter the more minds in your head, the better a bitsy inkweasel you will make. #writing in reply to damiengwalter #
- Kawaiieezer #jpop #coverband #
- "well, it works on MY machine…" #erryday #alldaylong #hideouslyboringworktweets #realtalk #
- Harglebargleston, mayor of. #
- if lying facedown in the kitchen hating myself for being awake while toaster melts mozarella onto objects is wrong, i don't want to be right #
- (i would like to be right about how to spell mozzarella, though, please.) #
- Scent of a bunny #pacino #picturebooks #
- CRUSH A CHILD'S DREAM. AND. PUT IT IN YOUR POCKET. SAVE IT FOR THE JUDGMENT DAY. #kvltcovers #
- @monicabyrne13 did not realize this was a story. Don't know what I thought it was exactly but now I'm excited to see it. in reply to monicabyrne13 #
- menopause, menoplay, menorewind #options #
- @monicabyrne13 sold out! Superb news for the playwright. May have to skip it though… in reply to monicabyrne13 #
- Just used "largesse" in a sentence, but I was talking to myself so I guess it doesn't count. #
- This chicken tastes exactly like a delicious lobster. #
- Inauthentic authenticity, trends. Excellent essay. “@SelfEdge: SHOTS FIRED: http://t.co/XbYfbcVH†#
- @damiengwalter information prostitute. in reply to damiengwalter #
- @monicabyrne13 we want to hide the world that shocks us from a curious soul that scales the throat & peeks out over the teeth in reply to monicabyrne13 #
- @monicabyrne13 or, you know, gasp filter. Don't want to suck anything dangerous into the lungs. in reply to monicabyrne13 #
- The Hunger Hippos #
- @AllisoNicole86 seconded. in reply to AllisoNicole86 #
- HE IS XUL SOLAR. HE FIGHTS CRIME. http://t.co/MZxsbjlY #
- "Let’s break out of the horrible shell of wisdom and throw ourselves like pride-ripened fruit into the wide, contorted mouth of the wind!" #
- et tu, shawty? then get low, caesar. #gitlow #gitlow #
- "Humans have never not relied on abstraction as a means of survival. Words themselves are abstractions…" v @moleitau http://t.co/TWqInVLV #
- @damiengwalter depends what you mean. As a gateway language or a standalone single most useful language? in reply to damiengwalter #
- @damiengwalter depends on what you want to do. Python is good, especially to beginners. JavaScript too, if you want to do mostly webby tasks in reply to damiengwalter #
- @damiengwalter harry potter moon and the unfortunate series of games and teeth chronicles in reply to damiengwalter #
- To go with 'mansplain,' I offer 'himprecise' and 'dudious claims.' #
- Leaving work before the sun sets feels weeeeeeeiiiird, eh. #
- Happy quasi-interNational Trollin' @realvalnolan Day. #
- I mean, nobody outside of the united states really celebrates saint patti's day, do they? @realvalnolan #
- Little know fact: st patti's day actually commemorates the Tuesday in which patti smith drove all the shivs into limerick. @realvalnolan #
- Paddy is short for paedroiaeìoggins, a common Irish name. @realvalnolan #
- lá atá inniu ann tá mé an-sásta nach mise liom gaeilge @realvalnolan #
- Drunken Irish stereotype. Drunken Irish stereotype. Drunken Irish stereotype. Dangerous-looking hand wobble. @realvalnolan in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan is it true then, that the commemoration day of GLORIOUSLY BEATIFIED SAINT PAEĪDROIEAF is really Irish thanksgiving? in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan cracking up at your ambulance news. Er, 'craicing up.' in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan the symbol of this advancement will be a tiger! For it is a most fearsome and crafty beast. in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan if you hear a knacker in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed, man. in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan but one man cannae ha morran one fadda, kinnee nao? in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan he was wearing a real teal track suit. He had a contract to build a bridge. in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan or in limerick apparently, cheesecake. in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan oh mercy. I don't even think I've done 90 documentable things in my lifetime. in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan eh, mockery aside, if i could be in Ireland right now, i would be. And I'd remember my passport. in reply to realvalnolan #
- @realvalnolan sure, and add the Rottweiler to my crime(s). I'm hoping that's some horrendous Irish euphemism. #
- trip to the grocery store yielded: eudora welty's collected stories, bottle of nutmeg, and an empty container of blackberries. #
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